Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Lars and the Real Community

This sermon is based on an idea and blog by Daniel G. Deffenbaugh, Associate Professor of Religion at Hastings College, Hastings, Nebraska USA. Much of it is in his words.

A couple of weeks ago Mary and I rented the movie Lars and the Real Girl. I actually think we rented it because it was one of those weeks were nothing else came out. We were not expecting that much; in fact, we knew nothing about it except that it had won some critical acclaim. Were we ever surprised... this strange and incredibly well done low budget movie turned out to completely illustrate for me what the kingdom of God might look like in a sleepy northern town. What in fact, I think the Kingdom of God looks is supposed to look like right here.

Lars Lindstrom is a pathologically shy young man who spends his days either at work or in a small apartment attached to the garage of his brother's house. On Sundays he has the opportunity to attend the local church where he tries as best as any awkward introvert can to become an active part of the community. His only comfort in life, it seems, is a powder blue blanket his mother knit for him while he was still in her womb. Lars never got to know his mother, however, since she died while giving birth to her son. He was then left to be raised by a grieving and emotionally unavailable father. As a result of these unfortunate circumstances, Lars's greatest discomfort in life is the touch of a human being – any human being. A friend's hand on his shoulder can send him into the deepest agony.


Knowing this, it is easy to understand why Lars tries to address his loneliness via the internet, ordering for himself a "fully functional" and life-like doll named Bianca, whom he immediately introduces to his brother and sister-in-law, and soon to the entire town, as his girlfriend. It is not long before Lars is seen accompanying Bianca in public, pushing her in a wheelchair (to which she has been confined from birth, he explains) and chatting with her about his childhood memories and his most intimate dreams. By all accounts it appears to be a budding romance, and going quite well, if it weren't for just one little problem. You know… the doll thing.

But here is where the Kingdom of God enters the picture. Were this one of those "realistic" films, we would at this point be treated to a kind of medical who-done-it where doctors chase down the patient's affliction and dismantle it piece by piece. Or we might see the derelict loner descend into a kind of delusional pathology that eventually manifests itself in mass murder. In any case, Lars would more than likely be portrayed as a psycho... as someone who is “other” and who we should somehow either fear or pity.

What makes this movie so powerful is that this does not happen.

See, it is not really a movie about Lars, the story is about his community, a town that has over the last twenty-seven years adopted him as its own. Lars is fortunate enough to live among an extended family that decides – beyond reason and despite fear – to stick it out with him, come what may. The community lovingly enters into his "delusion"... they begin to treat this lifelike extension of Lar’s need for love as one of their own. They care for her, they talk to her, they shop with and dress her, even give her a part time job. At one point, the local pastor even comments that Lars's companion "has become one of us. She is our teacher. She loves this town, and most of all she loves Lars."

After seeing this movie I was amazed that the town did what it did. It made me realize that this is the type of community I always talk about – that I would hope our churches either are, or could become... But at the same time, I realize that the church has all too often been content to uphold the status quo... to avoid the storms of this world and stay in the boat... and to mostly seek out people who are just like us.

Too bad the Bible is always trying to push us beyond our comfort zone. It makes it hard to just relax and think we have already done enough. Today we see a story in which Jesus has reached the end of his comfort zone – he is a Jewish prophet and teacher... he has a message for the people who go to his church... but that doesn’t mean he wants to interact with anyone else...

I love the story of the Canaanite woman because it throws an unwelcome wrench into the conventional image of the loving, accommodating, compassionate Jesus we all know and love. It certainly upsets Paul's frequent contention that in Christ there is no longer slave nor free, Jew nor Greek, male and female. On the contrary, Jesus here seems begrudgingly to offer his blessing to this woman... And the way I see it, this is the human Jesus that I can understand. We all have bad days, we all have our limits, we are all pushed to the point where we just don’t want to do the right thing anymore...

And there is always a good excuse... She was a woman. She was Canaanite, Lars has issues, that person has a disability... you get the idea...

I think this story made it into the Bible because it brings to light just how wrong Jesus’ first reaction was. We see it almost right away and we are shocked... and in that moment; we come to realize a little more deeply just what it is we expect of Jesus – and, dare I say it, just what we should expect from ourselves.

In the film, the love-starved Lars suspects that because of the hand he has been dealt in life he will have to endure a dismal existence devoid of the one thing he both craves and fears – human touch. Nearly three decades of being emotionally excluded by his father, and then by his brother, have left him with little choice but to find solace in a world of his own making. This retreat might have been complete had it not been for the realization on the part of his Christian community that they had a central role to play in suffering along with one of their own in order to keep him from slipping away from the fold.

To be honest it took a while for them to come around. The brother thinks Lars is crazy; the deacon at the church doesn’t want him to bring the doll to church. They invite the “couple” to a party and everyone feels uncomfortable... But... they soon come to see that there is a level of acceptance that we are supposed to have for each other – that there is a level of love that God expects us to have; which not only begins to break down barriers but goes further and actually heals.

It only took one wise comment from the Canaanite woman to bring Jesus to his senses. Were it only true that it would be so easy for me on most days. But we try. We try because ultimately Jesus did come to bring us that good news message that love can change the world. We try because most every one of us here can relate to the idea of being unloved. We try because God’s love for us can overflow into the world and make a difference.

The church exists as a place where we are strengthened to work at co-creating the world. The church is a place to be reminded of the values that God has in store for each and every one of us. It is, in fact, a consulate of God’s Kingdom in the world.

We are the hands and feet and heart of God, let’s continue to live up to the challenge.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Staying in the Boat

Friday we watched as the 2008 Olympics began. Every four years the world is brought together to watch athletes perform amazing feats of excellence in the various sports and we do so with a sense of pride as we watch people perfect their sport and live disciplined, and dedicated lives that result in personal bests and world best. It has also been a time when the world has paused and turned to these games as an opportunity to come together in peace and hope.

Sadly, this has not always been the case as politics and violence have marred the games in the past but the ideals of good will, good sportsmanship, peace still prevail at the games.

Personally, I love to watch the Olympics. The athletes inspire me and I love to think of the people just like me all over the world watching and all of us being drawn to what these games represent. It gives me a sense of hope for the future – people throughout the world can get along – that community can be brought together in the most amazing ways.

Community is not easy to create, and it is even more difficult to maintain, but it is a necessary part of who we are as human beings. By living in community and being in relationships we grow and develop and broaden our understanding of who we are, not to mention who or what we could be. And as spiritual people we find God in the midst of community and God call us out into community.

This morning’s gospel reading from Matthew is a well known gospel story. I have heard and written many sermons all about Peter and the importance of stepping out in faith. But this week as I prepared and did some research and reading I discovered some interesting facts that in the past had eluded me.

First of all Jesus never called for Peter to get out of the boat. After Jesus said, “Take heart it is I do not be afraid. “ Peter answered him, ‘Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.’”

If we read carefully you will notice that Walking on the water was Peter’s desire, born of his doubt that Jesus was who he said he was.

As the boat is being battered by the waves, Jesus calls to the disciples and tells them not to be afraid. But Peter’s response is to 1) to test Jesus. 2) Leave the other disciples and the boat.

Think about this shift in thought for a moment... Peter’s departure from the boat is not an act of faith, it is a decision which reveals the depth of his own neediness. A decision which did not consider the welfare of his friends, his community. The last thing the disciples needed was to have one of their own floundering in the water, forcing them to navigate the stormy waves in order to retrieve a sinking soul.

When Jesus asks, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” maybe he is not chastising Peter for sinking, maybe he is asking Peter why he did not trust when he was commanded to let go of his fear.

What we need to keep in mind is that this story is not just about the disciples; it is also a story about the early church – and because of this – a story about our church as well.

If we take the boat to symbolize the church, then the sea, as it often does, can symbolize chaos -- something that does occasionally creep into congregations.
Eugene Boring (Matthew, The New Interpreters' Bible) writes:

The sea itself in biblical thought connotes the forces of chaos, held at bay in the creative act of God, but always threatening (Gen 1:1-10; 7:11; Pss 18:15-16; 69:1-3; 107:23-32; 144:5-8). To the biblical mind, being on the sea is itself a threat, representing all the anxieties and dark powers that threaten the goodness of the created order. To be at sea evokes images of death, the active power that threatens the goodness of life. The sea is here a barrier that separates the disciples from Jesus, who represents the presence of God. In the midst of the chaos of the world, they are left alone in the boat/church, with only their fragile craft preserving them from its threat, buffeted by the stormy winds of conflict and persecution.
I think most of us can understand this imagery of the sea being a dark and stormy place... now, the real question is can you imagine yourself in the boat? As one of the disciples all we know is that Peter has left us and Jesus is... well, we are really not sure about Jesus...

Which brings us to the very basic question of faith: “Can we believe that Jesus is with us always (Emmanuel), even when all evidence suggests he is not?” Can congregations in the midst of their own struggles, chaos and storms believe that Jesus is still with them... even when we might have trouble seeing him?

Notice that Jesus' presence did not bring an instant miracle -- the stilling of the storm; but his assuring word: "Be courageous. I am he. Do not be afraid."

I wonder how many of our congregational struggles are the result of struggling in the boat without Jesus (or without his word)? How many people or congregations would be "terrified" at Jesus' desire to (miraculously) come to them, because they have become comfortable living without Jesus' in their midst? Thinking and hoping and praying for some way that they -- by themselves -- can solve the stormy waters?

What Boring wants us to see is that the "lesson" to be derived from this text is not "If he had enough faith, he could have walked on the water," just as the message to us is not "If we had enough faith, we could overcome all our problems in spectacular ways." This interpretation is wrong in that it identifies faith with spectacular exceptions to the real way the world works... Faith is not about going against the laws of reality, the laws of physics... if it were; all we would ever do is wonder why the magic does not work for us... and when we cannot overcome all of what real life is about - the realities of accident, disease, aging, and circumstance... we are left feeling guilty because of our "lack of faith."

What if the message of this text were "If Peter had had enough faith, then the whole word of God that Jesus spoke to him, be calm, would have been enough to assure him that God was there. Faith is not being able to walk on the water; but daring to believe, in the face of all the evidence, that God is with us in the boat. As the community of faith makes its way through the storm, battered by the waves, knowing that God is with us could be a very powerful message. In believing this we are free to look around and find that no matter what is going on; no matter how uncertain the future; the first thing we need to do is let go of our fear. We can let go because we are not alone on this journey. It is not up to us all by ourselves to solve any problem – and the church, as a community, is the place that this comes to life. Here we see God in our midst; here we come to understand that those who bring God alive to us are all around.

Jean Vanier, founder of the L’Arche communities writes:
“It is quite easy to found a community. There are always plenty of courageous people who want to be heroes…. The problem is not in getting the community started- there’s always enough energy to take-off. The problem comes when we are in orbit and going round and round the same circuit. The problem is in living with brothers and sisters whom we have not chosen but who have been given to us, and in working ever more truthfully towards the goals of the community. A community which is just an explosion of heroism is not a true community. True community implies a way of living and seeing reality; it implies above all fidelity in the daily round. And this is made up of simple things—getting meals, using and washing the dishes and using them again, going to meetings- as well as gifts, joy, and celebration. A community is only being created when its members accept that they are not going to achieve great things, that they are not going to be heroes, but simply live each day with new hope, like children, in wonderment as the sun rises and in thanksgiving as it sets.”

To be the church, to create community, is to do simple things in our city. By staying in the boat and working with our brothers and sisters we have chosen to work for God’s realm in Moncton. We see the gospel come alive because our faithfulness, because of our work – this is the true miracle, not walking on water.

Jean Varnier. Community and Growth. Darton, Longman, & Todd, 1979. Pages 10 – 11.

Found in The Westminster Collection of Christian Meditations, Hannah Ward and Jennifer Wild, eds.